“Seriously … stop yelling at me.”

Okay, I understand that the majority of car dealers feel their radio advertising must grab the attention of as many potential buyers as possible. I totally get that. But is shouting like a professional wrestler who’s describing how he’s going to hurl his opponent out of the ring with a folded metal chair really necessary? And if you’re on the radio, do you really need to record the spot using a megaphone? And you know what? If you’re trying to sound excited about selling cars, you don’t. You just sound mad. If Dr. Drew ever devotes an entire reality show to anger management, you might wanna audition.

Now, I’m not suggesting that all the yelling, the cave-like echoes, the techno music and the lasers don’t work. Because like everyone else, I, too, am a car buyer. So as much as I hate to admit it, I know for a fact that they do work, because they have worked on me. If someone is in the market for buying a new car, he or she won’t change the channel to avoid commercials. Instead, he or she might leave it on the station for the sole purpose of hearing every car ad. So, sure … the typical car advertising does work. But does it work because of the yelling, or does it work because a potential car buyer will listen to almost anything?

So why should a car advertiser want to shy away from the current trend? Here’s why … let’s say I’m driving down the road and hypothetically listening to some Wilson Phillips on the radio. Carnie’s rare solo comes to an end, so I of course change the channel (the skinny bitches hardly ever let her sing) and what’s the first thing I hear? Screaming and yelling about buying a new car. Will I stop and listen? I already have my new car, so the answer is a big honkin’ “no.”

But what if I hear something that’s interesting? Funny? Compelling? Something that makes me take notice? Something that makes me talk about it at work the next day. Something that makes me remember their name the next time I’m in the market to buy a car.

To sum up my little tirade, if you want to limit your listening audience, go ahead and yell over some earsplitting music and the occasional booming sound effect equal to that of an explosion of an abandoned school bus meth lab. But if you want the rest of the population to listen to you, do something different. Remember, whoever gets an opportunity to listen may not be car buyers today, but unless their last name is Yoder, they will be at some point. So go ahead, be brave, break out of the box and strike an emotional chord. Because otherwise, you may never make it past Sunday, Sunday Sunday.